Ravenclaw's Flavourful Revenge
by Jasmine Ann Snape
Summary: A food fight between Gryffindor and Slytherin gets interrupted by some Ravenclaws who are out for revenge. One Shot. Complete. Reviews are welcome!


Ravenclaw's Flavourful Revenge

AN: So this was inspired by a scene in "The Curse of the Mistletoe" by Hedw1g, the scene was about the food fight and how it was only Gryffindor versus Slytherin. Then I thought about my house, the Ravenclaws, with their knowledge they'd be aces on the battle field; so I thought I should give them a chance. Don't forget that they had a short amount of time to plan and execute so what they accomplish is pretty cool! So here it is. And yes there is a ship implied for Terry Boot! XD 

One shot go!

One thing to make clear, because I don't exactly know the layout of the Great Hall, here is what it's going to be for this:

Head Table

Ravenclaw Slytherin Gryffindor Hufflepuff

Door

There are long tables for each house of course but that's who sits where.

I NO OWN HARRY POTTER! J.K. IS THE QUEEN!

Anyways...

The food fight had not come out of nowhere as some people of lesser knowledge would think. No, its starts with one person, then escalates into complete chaos. That was what the Great Hall looked like that night.

It was Draco Malfoy who started it, immature git; he was flinging the peas from his dinner into Granger's hair. Then in usual Gryffindor fashion the other two thirds of the "Golden Trio" came back with a few mashed potato flings.

Then it was Slytherin's turn to up the ante when Malfoy's goons jumped up at threw bread buns at the Gryffindor table. Unfortunately their stand up caused everyone else to notice the situation, teachers and students included.

Then everything went insane, the teachers (some of them) actually joined in this battle. Dumbledore skipped over to the Gryffindor table and joined them in the battle. Professor Snape strode over to the Slytherin table at the same time while teachers like Madame Pomfrey, Professor Sprout, and Professor Flitwick attempted to calm the students down along with Professor McGonagall who was threatening detentions left and right but was ceremonially ignored by everyone, especially when she got hit with some stray mashed potatoes and gravy.

The Hufflepuffs were long gone as well being scared by the scene; the Ravenclaws however remained at the front of the Great Hall watching the scene unfold.

The Gryffindors, being lead by Professor Dumbledore, had turned their table over on its side to make a sort of barrack like shield, and all of the food from their table and the Hufflepuff table behind them was easy to get at.

The Slytherins however, were positioning themselves for an attack by having defensemen stationed periodically along their table; they had their supplies laid out in stations for ease of use. Also what was probably unseen by Gryffindors, was a group of Slytherins on each end getting closer to the sides of the Gryffindor table with a lot of ammo on hand. The Ravenclaws saw this as a great strategy on Slytherin's part, because the Gryffindors were distracted by the main force, others could go in their proverbial blind spots to ambush them.

Then suddenly a Ravenclaw named Nessa Andrews came up and got the attention of the Ravenclaw house.

"Hey!" she shouted, loud enough that she could be heard but quiet enough that the other two houses could not, "Why are we just standing around? We should be attacking, or doing something!"

Nessa Andrews was in the same year as the golden trio, 6th. Most people assumed she should have been sorted into Gryffindor with her take-charge attitude and desire to jump into battle.

Her long time friend, Terry Boot, stepped forward. "I agree, we know battle strategies inside and out. We could dominate these people, and get revenge on the Professors."

But, if one looked, they could see that not many professors were left in the room. Professors Dumbledore, Snape, and McGonagall were in it. Madam Pomfrey was on the sidelines cleaning some of the messier allies from the war, but the rest were missing. Professors Flitwick, Slughorn, Sprout, Hooch, and others were nowhere in the Great Hall. They were probably wherever the Hufflepuffs were, but nobody really cared.

Nessa piped up again, "C'mon everyone let's prove to them who we are!"

This time everyone cheered back, with their fisted pumped in the air. Everyone go into a huddle as jobs were assigned.

"Okay here's what we need. We will need: weapons, ammo, strategy, camouflage, and some tact. Any volunteers?" stated Nessa looking at everyone.

Terry Boot stepped up, "A team and I can handle weapons, I have been researching catapults and non bullet guns for half of the semester."

"Alright." Said Nessa, "The job is yours, gather some allies and start working."

"Well for camouflage we can make some totally adorable uniforms!" said Padma Patil, who was known for her fashion adoration.

"Go ahead. You and some younger students go and make some good battle wear, I noticed the book you were reading about it for Muggle Studies." Nessa remarked with a smile.

Cho Chang stepped forward after Padma and her team left, "As Ravenclaw Seeker I am quite familiar with strategy and tact, the Quidditch team and myself can devise some good battle strategies."

A curt nod from the rest of the team showed their agreement, "Okay go ahead. We just need some ammo. The rest of you. go to the kitchens to get some new food to use; the house elves will go crazy with happiness to help someone anyways."

Everyone nodded and went to work, this food fight was epic; and in the span of only ten minutes everyone returned and the fight between Gryffindor and Slytherin was still going strong.

"Okay, status report. Patil, go." Said Nessa authoritatively.

"We have uniforms and armour ready, if everyone would group up we can get changed now." Said Padma quickly.

Then they gathered up and their uniforms changed to black shorts and blue tee shirts with the Ravenclaw emblem on them, a blue camouflage bandana, goggles, black gloves, and black elbow pads and knee pads.

"And they have repelling charms on them so there would be no stains; they also have small notice-me-not charms for when we sneak around." Reported a first year.

"Perfect!" Nessa said, flashing a smile, and then she turned to Terry, "So how is the weapons front?"

"Well we have a few actually," said Terry with a sly smile, "Firstly we have the standard issue rifle."

Terry held up a long gun like rifle with an area to stuff food into, a trigger, and a slingshot. All in all, a good weapon.

"Everyone on the ground is to use this, we tested with the ammo team and it can hold up to 10 pounds of food in there." He stated, and then went on, "We have some brooms we stole from the cupboard which have been equipped with a better aiming system than the first rifle and can go 360 degrees and can hold only a little less than the rifle."

"How many broom aerials do we have?" asked Nessa.

"We have 10 right now." Said another Ravenclaw on Terry's team.

"Ok. That's good. Is there anything else?"

"Yep, two more items." Said Terry, "We have two catapults for aerial launches both human and food and a spaying gun." Said Terry.

"Show me!" said Nessa with a gleam in her eye.

Terry and Nessa walked over to a group of older Ravenclaws in a big group. What was seen was two large catapults with launchers the size of a big chair, their mechanisms were set to launch with teams prepared for relaunches by the dozen.

"Just one question," expressed Nessa with a hint of concern, "If we are launching people then how do they land safely?"

A random Ravenclaw came up, "We already solved that, we have cushioning charms on the floor and trampolines and people stationed on the other side."

"Good then, what is the last item?"

A long cylindrical object was passed to Terry by a passing student, "This is the spraying bazooka. It sprays liquids and shoots food out in waves. It is to be used in the air but also on the ground if needed." 

"Good," said Nessa forcefully, "Equip everyone with double holsters and weapons and pick fliers, report back when ready."

Nessa then walked over to the ammunition sector to see their progress. Apparently the team already visited the kitchens because there was a great variety from what was served at dinner at their disposal. Nessa signalled the troops and Luna Lovegood came up to report.

"Luna, what's the status on the ammunition? Have you spoken with Terry in regards to weapons yet?"

"Yes we have and all of our ammunition is cohesive with the weapons." She stated airily.

Nessa smiled at her friend, "So what do we have?"

"Well we mostly have experimental mixes of everything for the ground. Which we believe can do damage and can be added to on the field. For the air we have a little more." Said Luna with a smirk.

They walked into what looked like a makeshift chemistry lab that would have made even Professor Snape proud. It was like their potions classroom, just replace potions with food mixtures and it was practically the same.

"Alright so for the liquid shooters we have a few things. Firstly," said Luna as she pointed to an area of the "lab" we have some gravy mixed with bread crumbs, and then we have juice and ketchup with an infusion of bread as well. They are specially made for the shooters and for the air."

"Then," she continued, "we have the cherry bombs." She said as she held up a hollowed out bun filled with cherries that would explode on contact.

"These are good for aerials because they will explode on impact and have a bigger explosion with the added force of gravity."

Luna went on to show Nessa the mashed potato cannon balls, the meat bombs, among other items. Then Nessa went over to the strategy section for a final check before the attack, so far they had been only working for 20 minutes after the food fight started, it seemed like both sides weren't even starting to get tired yet.

The strategy team was wrapping up discussion when Nessa, along with Terry who had finished in his department, approached.

"Cho, status report." Said Terry, before Nessa had the chance. The pair shared a playful look until they turned back to Cho.

"Well we have watched the enemy and have assessed the weapons at our disposal and have come up with a number of sound strategies that will meld into the perfect plan." Said Cho with a grin.

"Let's have at it then." Said Nessa, beating Terry who had only just opened his mouth to speak.

Cho motioned to a pile of papers which the Ravenclaw Quidditch team was fussing over, the Ravenclaws stopped when they were approached and let Nessa and Terry see their plans.

Cho stepped forward to explain, "So for the air we have the people on the brooms using our Quidditch formation number 6 with stations for them to refill stock near the doors, they will fly in groups and patterns to be more efficient and cover more area stronger." Cho saw Nessa's nod and continued. "For the catapults we will start with a food drop to trick them into thinking it was the brooms, then we will launch a flier who will do a flip routine and in turn let out the contents of the spray guns all over the are below."

"Now on the ground," Cho continued, "is a different story, we will have teams sneaking along the walls while the enemy is distracted by the aerial attack so we can surround them and let out all fire. There will be a countdown and we will fire at once, thus showing who we are."

"Also if we get time some people have requested we carry out a special target mission on Professor Snape. If you desire we can corner him easily and assault him from all sides, then he won't be a threat later on." Cho finished, looking quite proud of her and the team.

"Carry out all the plans you mentioned. Now, gather the others, and brief them on their roles. Then, _we fight" _said Nessa

"Yes m'am!" Cho saluted Nessa.

All of the Ravenclaws rallied up at the doors again, all in uniform and armed with the weapons they would need. Some were prepping the catapults for launch and wheeling them up to the door, and others were finishing the filling of rifles for the final soldiers.

Nessa called attention, "Attention! Are we ready to fight?" her question was met with a chorus of cheers, "Alright! Well, remember your positions and don't back down! We represent Ravenclaw here! Now let the catapults have a minute head start then the ground team should go along with the fliers. Go!"

The Ravenclaw's cheered, and then went to analyse the enemy before the attack. It seemed like there was no real damage done yet as the Gryffindors had barracks and also had spotty aim when attacking the Slytherins. The Slytherins were mostly hitting the barrack wall because they couldn't launch food high enough to go over. Severus Snape seemed to have gone insane for her was skipping about the entire great hall, dumping food on students left and right and not even caring whom.

Then when they heard the battle cry the Ravenclaws let loose their first two cannons, made of a mix of mashed potato, jello, and peas. Its contents rained over the entire Great Hall in only the mass of 5 seconds, to the enemy's astonishment. While they were looking up two teams of Ravenclaws moved along the side walls behind both sides and came around to the front, making a complete circle.

The enemy was pulled out of their shock when they saw 5 Ravenclaws running through the centre of the Great Hall and they attacked. They were a distraction from the launch of the broom brigade and served well for when they were being shot at barely anything hit them and their own aim was immaculate. The 5 reached the end of the Hall and reloaded, watching the broomsticks reach the sky.

When the enemy saw what the five were doing they looked up, only to be hit by cherry bombs, jello, pumpkin innards, and other mishmashes that were unidentifiable.

Suddenly Harry Potter jumped up from the barracks; "Hey!" he shouted upwards, "Whose side are you on? You're doing a pretty good job of hitting everyone!"

Then Malfoy jumped up, "Probably from your side, Potter. With that lousy aim of hitting your own side." He snickered.

Then Nessa stepped up into attention, "We are on neither side." She said as she lowered her goggles, "We are the Ravenclaws, so prepare to lose suckers!"

As she spoke it was a signal to the catapults behind her to launch their first human load into the air. It was successful as Luna Lovegood and Cho Chang hurled through the air, completing many acrobatic moves that if judged would be a perfect 10. People gasped on the ground, but were quickly shut up as their mouths were filled with gravy and pumpkin juice mixtures that were emitting from the spray guns.

As they landed safely in the arms of two boys on the other side Nessa shouted her final order, "Alright troops! Full force, and take no prisoners." She finished with a sly smile.

Then the Great Hall was a flurry of flying food when everyone gave all they had and attacked, this battle went on for a good ten minutes before Gryffindor and Slytherin pleaded for mercy. The final flyers were caught and resources exhausted when Ravenclaw finally backed down. And when the dust settled, Ravenclaw was declared champion for they were the team with the cleanest members.

Dumbledore announced curfew and all the soldiers hobbled to their common rooms, some notable figures were seen along the way though. Crabbe giving Draco Malfoy the Heimlich manuvre for he had a stray cherry in his windpipe, that when finally free hit none other than Professor Snape. Snape didn't even look back as he hurried to his dungeons for a well needed shower, he didn't even notice the chocolate pudding stain that graced his back and bottom courtesy of a ground attack from behind.

Harry Potter and friends were seen congratulating the Ravenclaws and they cleaned food out of their hair. They were apologizing for not treating their house properly and calling their attack "A bloody spectacle" according to Ron.

Dumbledore retrieved the other students and teachers who were hiding out in the library, and found Flitwick and awarded the Ravenclaw house with 150 points for using their knowledge, propelling them into the biggest point lead the house had ever seen.

All in all, it was a good battle. And finally Ravenclaw house got their well deserved and flavourful revenge.

THE END!

I am really happy how this turned out! I found the battle scene hard to write at first, and it went through many rewrites since, but I am so happy to give the Ravenclaw house their own sweet revenge.

Thanks for reading! Reviews are loved! Please! Share it too! Share it with your friends, share it with your enemies, share it with your mom, share it with your teacher, share it with your dog, and share it with the hobo in your town! Thanks!


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